A new year. A new life? Barry believed it was possible.
It’s not that his old life was terrible or anything. To the contrary, it was
quite a success; depending on how one defined success. He had a nice job, which
paid a nice salary. He had a nice apartment in a nice apartment building. He
had a nice car. He had a nice boat. He had a nice 401k. But regardless of all
these nice things, Barry did not feel that his life was very nice.
Work.
Barry’s life had consisted of work and not much else. For the past fifteen
years he had traveled. He found himself in strange cities with strange names like
Omaha and Albuquerque and Baton Rouge. And because of this life of travel, he
seemed to age faster than most his age. Not yet forty and his hair grew
completely grey and his waistline gained an inch with each passing year. Airport
bars had become his home away from home. But it wasn’t his hair or his weight
or even his drinking that really bothered him. Barry was lonely. He had neither
a wife, nor a fiancée, or even a girlfriend for that matter. In fact, he couldn’t
even remember the last time he touched a woman.
A
resolution. Barry had never made one before. What was the point? Nobody ever
kept them anyway. But this year was different. He had recently been promoted to
sales manager, which meant no more travel. No more red-eye flights. No more
fast food dinners. This year things would change. He dyed his hair. He bought a
gym membership. He stopped drinking. He filled his apartment with inspirational
sayings. This year Barry would find a woman to share his life with.
A
prospect. She hit the gym each morning at seven, spending most of her time on
the treadmill. At first, her and Barry exchanged smiles. Then pleasantries.
Then finally, after two weeks, Barry found the nerve to run next to her. They
talked. They laughed. They enjoyed one another’s company. Perhaps she was the
one. Everything seemed to be going Barry’s way. He was working less. He was
losing weight. He was on the verge of asking out the beautiful woman from the
gym. Until…
Competition.
The man was tall and handsome, and had what people called a “million-dollar
smile.” And he was running on the treadmill next to her. Of course he was. Why
wouldn’t he be? She was beautiful. What was Barry thinking? That he could
possibly stand a chance with a woman like that? He suddenly felt old and fat
and ugly. So he quickly exited out the front door and headed to the nearest
fast food restaurant. After he gorged himself on all he could, he went into the
office and asked for his old job back. After work, he went home, ripped up all
of his inspirational sayings, and polished off a bottle. In the morning, hung-over,
he shut off his alarm and went back to sleep. Perhaps he could start his new
life next year.
The
resolution. Carol ran on the treadmill next to the handsome man. “So,” the man
asked, “where is this guy you’ve been telling me about?”
“I
don’t know what happened,” Carol said. “He used to come every morning. I really
wanted you to meet him. I really thought he might be the one.”
“Don’t
sweat it little sis’,” the man replied. “The year just started. You still have
plenty of time to fulfill your resolution.”
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